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Again, I’m not trying to be a Bitch in any way, I’m just critiquing your work to try to make you a better writer.AnnistaysiaReport 2014-12-17 06:37:22So, this is the third in the series. Free porn What makes these other male characters what to get their rocks off on and in him? We as readers can not see what you have in your head, so as a writer it is your job to make us see it by describing what you see. Again, I’m not trying to be a Bitch in any way, I’m just critiquing your work to try to make you a better writer.AnnistaysiaReport 2014-12-17 06:37:22So, this is the third in the series. What makes these other male characters what to get their rocks off on and in him? Again plot is good, and the story flows alright. You say his body is “gender confused”. I understood that by the way you described Eric with the black spiky hair.anonymous readerReport 2012-08-04 17:21:52xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxanonymous readerReport 2012-08-04 17:21:51xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxanonymous readerReport 2012-04-27 00:30:52great story, please keep writing more«12» This is because there really is little to no description on the main character at all. I also liked your reference of Sasuke, which I’m guessing your referring to Sasuke Uchiha from the anime series Naruto. Also please go into a bit more detail about his passed, what made his family resent him so bad, and treat him the way they did. However, I can’t stress this enough, character description is the difference between your “transgendered” boy or your “scrawny, frail” submissive boy.